Ever started a conversation with a client staring at a blank page?

You have to fill it with life.

What do I have to lose? If I don’t have anything to lose, then I am just naturally open to the outcome of a conversation. Different story if my bonus depends on «closing this sale». Free yourself! It shows and it’s felt!

The blank page is nothing more than a tool or to some extent a symbol. It’s about the power game between two parties. Who’s in control? To what extent am I comfortable giving up some of that control (over a conversation or more importantly the outcome of that conversation).

When practicing silence, I am allowing my conversational partner to take control of the conversation, only if he/she’s willing to accept the invitation, though. Not much different when I am starting a conversation staring at a blank page. I am signaling that I am ok with an unexpected outcome. Handing over paper and pencils to my counterpart even goes one step further: I am comfortable you taking over control.

The process naturally includes a very strong «goodfinding» element when you and your counterpart congratulate each other on the outcome: «Well done!» «Happy? I am!» «We have made some significant progress, haven’t we?»

Still scared?